Getting Help for Your Marriage

One of the strangest things about marital problems is our aversion to getting help. I have witnessed many people who seemed to have everything together in their marriage, to suddenly file for divorce or announce their separation. We all make the collective gasp when we hear the shocking news, be it through their own reluctant prayer request or a juicy “Christian” gossip session disguised as prayer request (don’t get me started about those)!

Facing the Truth

Many of us have the false idea that as a Christian we should never have marital problems. After all we are saved, sanctified, and self-proclaimed soul-winners! The truth is we are all human and will at some point experience challenges in our relationships, challenges that may require additional help to process. These challenges come in many shapes and sizes such as tragedies, disappointments, unfaithfulness, etc… the list goes on and on.

Why We don’t Get Help

  • Spiritual Pride

    The most ridiculous and nonspiritual reason of all! Talk about an oxymoron! Are you spiritual but prideful or prideful about being spiritual? Here is a big spoiler alert… we are all human and sinful! That means that we all need help from time to time. The whole idea of being a disciple of Jesus is a need to be taught, a need to grow, and a need to learn.

    Honestly, the closer I get to the Lord, the more I realize my own weakness and inadequacy. If being “spiritual” to you means never needing any help, then maybe it is time you reevaluated your use of that term.

  • Failure to Accept Reality

    Pretending everything is OK does not fix anything. Some people are great in Church at playacting. A couple may argue all the way to Church, then flip on their “spiritual” face upon arriving in the parking lot.

    Stop ignoring your marital problems. If you are unhappy, if your marriage is struggling, or if you have fallen out of love, then face the problem and take constructive steps to fix it.

  • Complacency

    Sure you have problems, but everyone else does too. After all, what can you do about them? Learning to live with marital problems is like learning to live in a trash dump. You just get used to the stench and eating rotten foods all the time.

    Don’t settle for a second rate marriage, put God’s Word to use in your life. Get the help you need.

Available Sources of Help

  • Specialists

    • Pastors- Can guide you through Bible principles for your marriage.
    • Christian Counselors- Are trained to help you work through difficult problems.
    • Physicians- Can help you with physical, hormonal, and even mental health issues.
  • Resources

    • Books
    • Websites
    • Podcasts
    • Sermons
  • People

    • Godly Christian Couples who have been where you are.


Get the help you need for your marriage. You have invested too much in your marriage to let it slip away from you.

Remember that God has something amazing planned for your marriage.